Let me give you a breakdown of my week. I spend roughly 40 hours sat at a desk, I get in and I help my wife cook dinner, we might take the dog for a walk. Every weekday i’m knackered. When the weekend rolls around, and we have some spare time, we might wanna go for a skate.
One thing that completely ruins the one time in every 2/3 weeks that I can actually go for a skate, is middle class idiots in parka coats climbing the obstacles at a skatepark so little timmy can ride down and literally ruin the lines of most people in the park.
Now don’t get me wrong; we all have to start somewhere. And I understand a skatepark is built for the community. But when I get limited time to go skateboarding, I want to get a go without some Marks and Spencer spokeswoman blocking off a chunk of the park so her spawn can have 50 goes riding down a funbox.
If your child is not confident at riding a scooter, why the fuck would you let them loose on a skatepark on a barbie toy scooter? That’s like giving a learner driver a peddle kart and telling them to navigate the M25 or the Swindon Magic Roundabout. It puts your kid – and everyone around them – in danger. Teach them on flat ground, or come down the skatepark first thing in the morning before it gets busy. If the skatepark is clearly too busy I would argue why are you putting your kid in harm’s way? As a full grown adult, I really don’t want to spend my one day off dodging toddlers as I try not to flatten them as I skate round the park at full pelt.
The argument of the skatepark being for everyone is not a free pass for anyone with zero experience to interrupt a busy skate session. If anything, those with far more experience are more entitled to use a skatepark as there is literally no where else they could practice – kids “playing” on scooters can enjoy riding them wherever if they are just planning on going down and up things. Skateboarders get kicked out of everywhere on the street, and when we finally get a skatepark built it turns into a daycare centre…
I have no problem with kids learning to ride skateparks properly. I encourage them to learn, as they are likely the future scene. If they learn the basics and find their own path, however, they can make friends with other riders, learn naturally and pick up the rules of the skatepark. With a rad dad sat watching them (or in many cases, not, as a lot of them are oblivious to skatepark accidents waiting to happen), they are wrapped in cotton wool, oblivious to the problems they cause, and will likely never learn.
Any challenge to their obstruction is met with “don’t tell my kid what to do” or “who do you think you are”, or in the worst case some nastier parents resort to fisticuffs when skateboarders try and explain the rules of the skatepark and how their kid is ruining the session. Any collision usually ends with parents kicking off at the rider involved, who for the most part was riding attentively until an unpredictable toddler appeared in front of them. My opinion in most of these situations is – if you haven’t been riding skateparks for years upon years, you are wrong. Apologise, get the fuck up, and learn. That’s what riding skateparks is about, not throwing a wobbly every time someone runs into your precious little angel.
Scootering (and to an extent, other extreme sports) need an entry level for skateparks. I’ve long believed that every skatepark should have a minimum spec for ability, or at least for understanding of rules. The same way we teach kids the rules for crossing the road, or riding a bike on the street. The appeal of skateboarding is it’s lack of rules, but that aspect is being abused by idiots who think skateparks are playgrounds. At the very least parents and new riders need an easy guide to tell them they should stand out of the way, not sit on ledges and for god’s sake WAIT YOUR FUCKING TURN. If we had that, getting out for a skate once a fortnight would be much nicer.
The Terrible Company 
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